This post is proudly sponsored by Cake Maternity in celebration of World Breastfeeding Week
In preparation for the arrival of our baby (before we even knew it would be our little girl, Jeanie), as many soon to be mums do, I devoured literature, blog posts and podcasts preparing for birth. The information was readily available for any and all scenarios. I went into the challenge of labour excited and feeling as prepared as I could be, ready for the unknown.
The shock came after my 17 hour labour and 2 hours of pushing. After I held my precious new babe in my arms. Hormones flying, sleep deprived and fumbling my way through learning how to be a new mum, I quickly learned that breastfeeding can be extremely tough on many new mums.
Though cracked and blistered nipples that seemed to show up instantly, I suffered through the first day of learning to breastfeed my newborn. By day two I was in such excruciating pain, that I decided to give pumping a go to rest my damaged nipples and keep Jeanie’s tummy full with milk. Jeanie had certainly done a stellar job at bringing my milk in, and I was able to express a good amount of milk fairly easily, which I now realise is not the case for all women. We were lucky in this case.
By the time I was home, I already felt like I was failing. Fighting through the agonising pain, scared that I would not be able to continue our breastfeeding journey, one I so desperately wanted for my baby and I.
I sent an urgent message to my husband’s Aunt, who is a midwife, asking for any advice that might help. She came over to help me with Jeanie’s latch and reassure me. I still remember her smiling and saying, ‘I was expecting your call yesterday’, it made me realise that what I was going through was actually fairly common, yet so many new mums don’t know this and blame themselves for struggling with something that we are taught is meant to be easy and ‘natural’.
The following months of our breastfeeding journey were littered with challenges. Nipple trauma, latching issues, tongue ties, nipple thrush, oversupply, blocked ducts, mastitis, gagging, chocking, so much vomit, and so many tears from both Jeanie and I. It’s been a journey for sure, and now when I look back on it 9 months on, I am so proud of the work, patience and perseverance that it took for the journey to be possible at all.
This years World Breastfeeding Week theme is ‘Protect Breastfeeding: A shared responsibility’, and I think it’s important to point out that our journey may not have been possible without the support of so many people around us. Not only the professional help of midwifes, lactation consultants, tongue tie specialists and GPs, but also the emotional support from my doula Lauren and friends who shared lactation cookie recipes and kind words of encouragement. Most of all my husband Grange who rushed to me with a water bottle at every feed, who helped me pump, wash bottles, freeze milk and tried to calm me in the tough moments when our journey was at its hardest.
My hope is that new mums will be better equipped with knowledge about breastfeeding so that they can be kinder to themselves when it gets tough, or if the journey requires a change to bottle or formula feeding. There is no shame in doing whatever it takes to help your baby thrive.
So if you are a new mama, or know any new mamas, please share this post far and wide so we may normalise the joy and challenges of breastfeeding.
Here’s what I learnt….. read on below
Breastfeeding is hard for some women and impossible for others. It doesn’t work out for all of us and that ok.
Breastfeeding is not an easy journey. There are a lucky bunch of women who take to it like a duck to water, but for the majority it takes work, and it is a learned skill for both baby and mother. The probability of having an easy journey can be vastly affected by so many different factors. Prem babies (like myself who was formula fed), oral ties, high palate, inverted nipples, over supply or under supply of milk & latching issues to name a few.
Also not everyone enjoys it, and that’s ok too. There are even rare cases of women who suffer from DMER, a condition marked by an abnormal chemical and hormonal reaction that causes a brief but abrupt negative emotional response at milk letdown.
Breastfeeding is a privilege, and I truly am an advocate for the adage, ‘fed is best’. I believe that there should never be any judgement on what an individual chooses for their own and their babies physical & mental wellbeing.
I got sooooooo thirsty & hungry.
The thirst felt during breastfeeding is like nothing I’ve ever experienced before. I could smash a little of water in 10 seconds during a feed in the early days.
Apparently this intense thirst is triggered by oxytocin to ensure you’re staying hydrated enough to recover from birth and be able to produce more milk for your baby. Amazing huh!? So keep a couple of water bottles near by together with some one handed snacks as breastfeeding is hungry work.
I walked around topless A LOT, and also thought about my nipples and boobs in ways I never have before.
During a particularly bad week in which I ended up with mastitis, I found myself topless, with one boob floating and soaking in an epsom salt bath which I’d fashioned out of a small bowl. This I did in front of both my mother and husband (at the same time).
I feel pretty confident saying that in no part of my mind had I ever considered walking around topless in front of my loved ones… but hey motherhood does some amazing shit to your self esteem if you’re lucky. It’s survival.
As well as this there was a lot of thought put into keeping my nipples clean and dry, popping pads/ointment/gel on them, constant massaging of breasts, epsom salt baths, cold packs, heat packs and more walking around the house topless a lot.
For me it truly has been one of the most wonderful bonding experiences with Jeanie, but it did not come easy.
In my case, perseverance and time helped our journey. At one stage I was so scared to feed Jeanie. My oversupply and overreactive let down meant Jeanie would choke and vomit at each feed, and the anxiety would overcome me as the time drew closer to the next feed. I spent sleepless nights researching tongue ties and agonising on wether to correct Jeanie’s tie or not. I cried many many times, feeling like a failure and scared that I was letting her down. Not to mention the hours on end of feeding that leave you feeling touched out.
But on the other side of the struggles, came a truly beautiful act and bond between Jeanie and I. Moments together alone in the middle of the night where we just snuggled and simply existed. Times during the afternoons when I put my phone down, my worries aside and it’s just us. I feel equal parts lucky and proud to be able to breastfeed and am so grateful for the support I received….
I had to accept a lot of help
What I do know is that I may not have continued had it not been for the support around me. So my advice to other mamas if they ever feel like they are in this situation, is to reach out for help around you.
Contact your hospital to see if they offer breastfeeding support programs, contact the ABA for free support over the phone, reach out to your friends who have had babies, and be kind to yourself whatever the struggles or the outcome. Your baby loves you no matter what.
I craved comfort and to connect to myself.
After the early days of topless abandon, I started to crave some sort of ownership of my body back. You give so much of yourself both emotionally and physically as a new mum, that the simple act of popping on some nice underwear can do wonders.
I honestly tried so many brands, and in truth some where functional but made me feel daggy. I finally found Cake Maternity and now rave about them to any new mum or mum to be who will listen, which is why I reached out to them for this collaboration.
Cake maternity design nursing bras and maternity bras for women who want support, comfort & functionality but don’t want to compromise on style. Their designs are feminine and designed with a wealth of mama-hood experience ensuring that their bras make breastfeeding easier while supporting mothers & their bodies.
Babies are rightfully front and centre when they arrive in this world, but hard working mamas can sometimes be overlooked, so if you’re a new mum and want to treat yourself or you want to gift something special to an expecting mum, check out Cake Maternity.
The team at Cake Maternity have also kindly provided a code for my readers for 15% off your next purchase, if you use LUCIANA15 at checkout.
Their bras and garments will be a beautiful, thoughtful, and functional gift that will be truly appreciated by any new mama.
Wearing: Cake Maternity Tutti Frutti Nursing Bra in Mocha*
Photography by: Lei Lei Clavey / This post is sponsored by Cake Maternity and features gifted* products